Raising my sons with large age gaps has it’s challenge and a whole lot of rewards.
Coming from a family of 6 siblings, all of us are very close in age. With me being the oldest, I had the experience of knowing what it was all like. My mother had all six of us by the time she had turned 24 years old. Six kids in seven years. No twins, by the way. In fact, there were 2 children born 11 months apart, and 2 more children born 10 1/2 months apart. Needless to say, she was on a fast track after having the second born almost 3 years after me.
A little crazy, you think? Every person and every family is different.
Some may think the children will forever have a bond with each other, being born so much closer together.
I have to disagree. From my own experiences, I truly believe it is mostly about how the children are being raised. Not by their age gap. It is how or if they are taught to love and respect each other, is how it factors out.
Having my boys with large age gaps in between each other, was just how things happened.
Life just happened.
Becoming pregnant at the very young age of 16, obviously wasn’t in the plan. It just happened. But, from that moment of knowing I was going to become a mother for the very first time, I would become the best mother I could be… to all three of my sons.
I was raising my Levi, during the rest of my teen years. It wasn’t until later after I was married after a few years, we decided to add to our little family. Levi was 6 years old when little brother, Gatlon came into our little world.
I loved the thought of having them 6 years apart. Although, my friends would always say, “But, you’re starting all over again!”
Yes, of course I had to repurchase all the material things after having every child. But, as time goes on, so does change. The car seats, cribs or even some clothing changes after a few years. So what?
But, it was just the beginning. My little family was becoming a family I wanted to create. I wanted to surround my children with endless love… and have them feel love towards each other.
Then, life just happened again through the years after having my second son.
My third and last child, Easton was born 9 years after my second, and 15 years after my first child.
Of course, you’re probably thinking I could of had maybe one child in between the 9 year gap. But, each of my children came at different chapters in my life. Each of course, a true blessing.
The advantages of raising my sons with large age gaps:
I am able to focus on each child at a time. Giving them the attention they need while they are going through their individual stages of childhood. Guiding them through all stages to adulthood, and becoming a man… a gentleman.
I feel there is more bonding time as mother and son.
I have always enjoyed watching how each older brother becomes an example and shows how much he cares for the younger brother. And, with each other, in general.
There’s no jealousy. Nor, beating up each other, as brothers normally do.
The only challenge I face is now that Levi has been out on his own for almost 5 years doing the grown up thing, is to have them join together and have brother time as much as possible. I truly cherish and feel my heart melt when I get to see all of my boys together, loving each other.
I know that my job as a mother is to not only bond with each of my sons, but to have them bond and love each other, too.
My boys may not be within 18 months of each other, or have the same interests, or even be in the same schools with each other… but they are all very close. They love and cherish each other, as brothers should.
What are your thoughts/opinions of big or small age differences between siblings?